Friday, October 31, 2008

Monday, October 27, 2008


Well today was Anthony's surgery. Overall, it went well. It was a day that I did not look forward to for quite some time. I did not want my little boy to be put under, let alone be put in an immense amount of pain. I know he's on meds, but it still has to hurt! 

I didn't have time to think about the surgery, as I probably would have been a mess. I checked in on them last night, and I started to cry. I was great all morning long...And then we got in the car, I looked at him so sweet in the backseat with his little pacifier and pj's on...and just let it flow! I just wanted to hold him and protect him!! He was just too sweet!

We arrived at the hospital just after 6am(such an early morning!). We did all the paperwork, prep etc... It was decided I would go back there with him(the emotional wreck person that I am). I walked back there with him and was totally fine, until I saw the OR. The machines, EVERYTHING. It just kinda freaks you out. Then I sat down and he sat on my lap. He looked up at me with the saddest look...he was looking at my face mask. He didn't know what it was. It was so sad! Then, they came with his face mask. He fought it. And fought it. He cried. He turned his head. There eventually were three nurses and myself. I was crying. He was crying. Gosh, it was terrible. Probably moreso for me than him. Finally, he took enough deep breaths and drifted off to sleep. I gave him a kiss, and left him in their hands. 

This was before 8am. Tony and I sat and waited. And waited. And waited. We got called around 11:15/11:30am-he was out of surgery and in the recovery room. He was in there drinking his second bottle of sugar water. He was chugging! Poor guy was so hungry/thirsty!! He just laid there-relaxed, calm. My sweet Anthony...

I won't bore you with all the other stuff. Basically-we got the protocol for when we are at home-and we were on our way home after 1pm. It was a long day! He is on a lot of meds-for pain, for infection, for spasms of the bladder...It's not going to be a fun week, that's for sure. He needs to wear two diapers-one with a hole in it for the catheter and his area to go through-and the other diaper to cover that all up. Other than that-he should be good to go. Still-it's going to be a long week!

We got home at 1:30pm, had lunch and then Tony and I napped for a bit. Anthony slept on my mom and his mom's chest the rest of the afternoon. He was just so sweet. I then took over. I loved it...brought me back to when he was an infant and just lay there and sleep on your chest. Awww...Well-I was hungry. So-I had a veggie stick. I put one to his mouth-as he was laying on my chest-and SLEEPING. Well-he woke up as soon as that veggie stick hit his lips! It was like he was automatically back to his old self! He was still a bit sleepy-but he was EATING! YAY! It was so great to see that smile again! It will never get old! 

So I am happy to report that he is the happy little camper now. Well-as long as the meds are doing their job. I hope he doesn't wake tonight-but I don't have high hopes on that. If he does, we will have the medicine ready. Please let it be a good sleeping night! Here are some photos from today:

Waiting to be called:

Dressed and ready!

Looking cute! 

Playing with the toys!

It's been a tough and long day-but it's over! Anthony post-op.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Photos #2

Photos from their actual birthday... October 18th, 2008:

They are not too sure of what is in front of them...

Nicholas is all smiles! Thanks to daddy...

Just look at that face! He looks like he is in sugar shock!

This seems tasty!"
We made it one year!! It was AMAZING!
Cleaning up after cupcakes! 

Daddy planting a tree to signify the first year

The boys posing for their 12 month photo!

Look at that happy guy!

Nicholas tries out the new wheels-a gift from Mommy and Daddy!

Anthony seems to like the new wheels..

Aww...look-they are sharing!

This photo was taken at 12:57pm on October 18, exactly one year to the MINUTE, when the boys entered this world.

Anthony posing for his 12 month photos 

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Photos #1

       The cakes for the adults
The cookies I slaved over a stove for two days for! But they were GOOD!
Yep-their gifts! A LOT of them! 
                     The paparazzi!
The birthday princes! Nicholas does NOT like the crown!
"Yummy! Cake!"
Nicholas wasn't so sure...
Look at that face!
Nicholas seems to enjoy it!

I'll post pics from their actual birthday tomorrow...

Saturday, October 18, 2008


I can't believe it. It's unimaginable. However, I need to come to terms eventually. My baby boys..are ONE. They are no longer babies. They are toddlers. 

I do not think words will ever be able to describe the shear joy these boys have brought into my life, our lives. They are the most beautiful boys, inside and out. Their smile lights up a room, their laughter is contagious. Their looks are priceless. And they are all mine. 

After dealing with four years of infertility, and wondering if I would ever become a mother...these boys are a true miracle.  A miracle for many reasons. After three failed IVF's, our boys came to us after the fourth IVF. Someone had a bigger plan than myself. It wasn't on my time that I could have kids. Only after the boys did I realize why I hadn't been pregnant sooner-my boys weren't ready to meet me yet. And boy am I glad they picked me. They have made me the proudest mother. 

I never knew motherhood could be so rewarding. And I will be honest-and say I did not find being a mother of twins...hard. Seriously. I would do it again-happily. Sure-there were trying times, but I could possibly count them on one hand, maybe two hands. Yes, I've shed my share of tears. But in all consideration that I've been a SAHM for the last 12 months-doing this on my own, getting them on schedules, etc... it wasn't hard. You can not set yourself up for great expectations. You need to go with the flow. That's what I do. I don't read books about this or that. I read my children. I meet their needs-not the needs of the books, or the "experts." I am their mother-I know best. And I worried about this-that I wasn't this mother who was sucked into all of the info that is out there-in terms of, well, anything. As parents, we try to fit the mold of society. What everyone else thinks is right. I may not be an overly cautious mother. But I want my kids to be able to explore-and not worry about getting dirty. Or what others may think. I want them to do things on their own. They don't always need me at their side-24/7. 

When I was pregnant, I thought I would never leave the house with TWO babies. I thought I would be the biggest worry wart and not do MANY things out of fear. I thought I would worry about every fall, bump, scratch. Everything. However, I didn't. I am pretty relaxed, considering there are two of them. 

This was the most amazing year in my life. I can't believe it has gone by so fast. My two little miracles are growing up right before my eyes. I would do this over and over again. 

I've been blessed-in more ways than I could have ever imagined.

 So Nicholas and Anthony-I want to wish you the happiest birthday ever. All I ever want for you, as well as daddy, is for you to be happy. It's what counts. And to try your best. As long as you put your heart into it-you will succeed. And we will be beside you every step of the way. We love you!!!

Pictures to follow...

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Busy? What's that??

Well...the party is very quickly approaching! I can't even believe it's almost here. Insanity! Especially when I thought the day would never come. I for TIRED. I wouldn't happen to know why! I was up till almost 12 last night...making cookies. When I am done posting this, I am going to do another batch of sugar cookies, this time with frosting. We'll see how this recipe comes out. It's a friends grandmother's recipe. I have it in the fridge now, hoping it will harden enough for me to use the cookie cutter. It says to put in the fridge over night. I am praying it works. One less thing for me to do tomorrow!

And...I think I am getting sick. I had a cold of some sort in the beginning of the week. It seemed to disappear yesterday, and today... I don't know. It seems like it is coming back! UGH! Talk about timing!

As for the boys...well....they are quite the sight! Nicholas had EI today-to see if he still qualified. He did not of course. And it was funny...the therapists needed him to do certain tasks..well...he can be stubborn and wouldn't do it. Well, Anthony was sitting on my lap, or near me, and he would be doing what Nicholas was SUPPOSED to be doing. Such a little ham! Nicholas eventually would do the things that were asked of him-just not on cue! 

The other night we were eating steak for dinner. The boys were done with their food so we took them out of their highchairs and they were walking around. They saw Tony eating, so they were both standing at his legs, waiting or anything! Well...apparently Anthony didn't like that he couldn't have any. Next thing you know, you hear Tony go, "OWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!" OMG! I started laughing hysterically! Anthony BIT him! In the knee! It was too much! And let me tell you-he HURTS!!!

As for Nicholas and his walking....He has done it A LOT more lately. He is totally walking...But it's on his terms-and his terms only. But he walked greater distances today. I can't believe it. 11.5 months old and my little boy is walking. 

Well...I need to go make some cookies. I need to get moving so I can go to BED! At this will be tomorrow before that happens!