Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone! What a great year it has been. Christmas will never be the same, now that the boys are here. It was like this last year-don't worry! So bittersweet to have two beautiful, healthy, absolutely amazing boys in our life. I couldn't picture it any other way. 

Christmas Eve we hosted 11 people total, 13 if you include the boys! We had a late dinner and we ended up keeping the boys up a bit later so Grandpa Lang could see them. They did really well too seeing how they are sick, not napping well, and went to bed 90 minutes later than usual. 

We had the boys open their presents before we had dinner to get it out of the way. They were REALLY cute about it! Anthony is just like his daddy in that he LOVES opening presents! He sees a gift and charges toward it to open it! It's really cute. Nicholas likes the paper more than the unwrapping. Once he gets the paper, he starts to tear it apart, and apart, and apart! It was funny because say Nicholas is opening a gift and Anthony is as well. Well, if one sees more of the other gift than their own, they drop their gift and go to their brothers gift! Go figure! LOL! It was pretty much spend a minute or two with each gift, then they were off onto something else. They got Elmo Live from Auntie Meredith which was a hit(maybe moreso for the adults!), and Zia Jennifer got them the Little People's Airplane, BIG blocks, a sweater/shirt, and a puzzle. Grandma and Grandpa Lang gave them lots of toys as well-Curious George, a Winnie the Pooh, an Elmo CD player, a book... An endless list! They made out like bandits and Santa didn't even arrive yet! 

And the biggest news? I haven't even mentioned the biggest news yet...Anthony is WALKING! That's right! My boys pick BIG days to start really walking! Nicholas walked on October 4-which was their First Birthday Party. Anthony walked on December 24-Christmas Eve! Now he has been taking steps here and there-so we knew he was close. And then all of a sudden on Christmas Eve-he just really started walking more and more. Now-he's not doing laps around the house or anything just yet! But he feels more secure now on his feet and will definitely take a few steps-to get to someplace he can hold onto. If he falls down in the process, well-he's down and out and crawls! He's a smart cookie! But he definitely is doing a lot more of it! Such a big boy! He's an amazing kid, he really is. They both are of course! 

Christmas morning was nice and relaxing until we had to really get moving to go to Uncle Robert's in Marblehead. The boys opened a few presents, not all-as they have no clue. There are still quite a few under the tree... Tony and I exchanged presents as well. He really had me quite perplexed this year! He ended up getting me a popcorn popper(I HATE microwave popcorn), some popcorn, monogrammed comfy slippers, an ornament that reminds him of me reading to the boys, and a necklace that signifies motherhood. He did a good job! Really though-he always does! I gave him FIFA 09 for the XBOX, as well as a new controller(which he does not need), and the ipod thing for the car. He has one-but it's crappy. This one should be better. It better be at least! 

We drove off to Uncle Robert's at 9:40am. We arrived at around 12:15pm. Why so late? Nicholas got sick in the car, JUST as we were getting off the highway. The poor kid. I felt so bad for him. Not to mention-I really didn't have extra clothes-and he was COVERED-so he HAD to be changed. Thank goodness I brought their pajama's to change into otherwise-I would have  been SCREWED! The poor kid got changed in the back of the car and it was FREEZING. He was SCREAMING like when he was an infant and cold. I had to clean up the carseat and daddy changed him. We ended up changing the seat around and hope that helps it. I certainly hope so! 

After that-the rest of the day went very well. We hung out with my mom, brother, sister, sister in law, and my niece and nephew. They all opened gifts which were all a huge hit. The boys got some really nice blocks and this cool frogger jumping ride on thing! Hard to explain-but from the looks of it-Nicholas is going to LOVE it! We had a delicious dinner, wonderful dessert, and then we were on our merry way! The boys slept almost the whole way home-they were beat! They did great though all day with NO nap(Nicholas did 30 minutes on the way, and Anthony did maybe an hour) and they are sick. We got home at 7:30pm and they were in bed by 8pm, with no fight at all. My little boys are beat! 

All in all it was a great Christmas. It's amazing to think of how next year, it's going to be SO different. I wouldn't have it any other way! Motherhood is the best gift one could ever be given. 

Merry Christmas everyone! 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!

We want to wish Daddy/Tony a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Unfortunately he is not home with us. He is in Atlantic City for a seminar for work. He should be driving home tonight, however, our first storm of the season just dumped about a foot of snow on us, so it was best he stay one extra night than get stuck driving in crappy weather/conditions. We can't wait until he gets home tomorrow to give him his gift and hopefully go play in the snow for the first time! :) 

As for the boys and myself... We have just spent the last 3 days-ALONE! And guess what? We survived!!! It really wasn't that bad. In all honesty, it was an extra two hours in the day I was alone with them. They were great as usual. They really were. Not too fussy and all around happy. I think Nicholas might be coming down with something or he's teething. In any event, I did give him a little bit of motrin tonight. Two nights ago he woke up a lot, which made me think teething then. Who knows. Nonni came over for a bit on Wednesday, then my mom came over yesterday. Today before the storm, my mom and his mom were both here for about an hour give or take. So I did have visitors and a little help while daddy was gone. And surprisingly, I am not all that exhausted. Wonder why??

As for Anthony-he is taking more and more steps! It's crazy! He is going to be walking in no time. Scary. It's like he's not a baby anymore! And he is si proud of himself! Each day he takes another step alone...You blink and you will miss it! He really is such a joy. They both are. How did I get so lucky??

As for #3, I swear I felt him/her move yesterday! I have had a headache since Monday that comes and goes. So I bought some coca-cola and was drinking that-along with some gummi bears! ;) I sat on the couch and felt a constant twirling sensation in my lower left stomach-which is where the baby is. I felt that same sensation tonight again. So-MAYBE!!! I am 14 weeks and 2 days pregnant. My big u/s is scheduled for January 16! And NO-we are not finding out the sex at the appointment and I am beyond excited to not know! 

I just realized I had laundry to switch over/add, whatever. It never ends. However-here are some recent photos of my cuties! 

Nicholas fingerpainting/eating for the first time!

My big boy getting his FIRST haircut!

Look at those cheeks!!!! That is a banana the lil' monster shoved in                                                   his mouth!
Can we say troublemaker? Here he is...in a bucket! 

Daddy's future poker stars. 'Nough said! 

STEPS!

I have to post before I forget and get distracted. I have to make calendars on Snapfish tonight, so I probably won't have time to post a quick update on Anthony....

He took TWO STEPS yesterday(December 10, 2008)!!!! I was sooooo proud of him! And Daddy was able to see it as well! We went to Tony's office for lunch. We were locked away in his office while Nonno was in a meeting. Gina(cousin/secretary) knocked on the door. Anthony was right near the door. She bent down and he took two steps towards her-right into her arms. It was a proud mommy moment! 

So this morning-he took ONE step towards me!!!! He's going to be walking in no time! Then what am I going to do?!?!?! LOL! 

BIG NEWS!

I can FINALLY announce it...seeing how the one other person that reads this(minus the online community and my sister) now knows...

Nicholas and Anthony are going to be BIG brothers! Tony and I are more than thrilled. We are excited to be adding onto our family. It caught most people by surprise as we kept it a secret from everyone. My close friends knew we were cycling, as well as Tony's cousin-as she babysat the boys when we had the procedure. Yes, this was planned and NOT a big miracle. We did an FET on October 1. We met with the Dr back at the end of August. Tony and I had a date of late October/November to do transfer. She agreed, until she said I was on the cusp of being able to have some tests done-and seeing how I was there...why not. So we did! And that pushed our timeline up a whole month! I waited for my cycle to start-Sept 10-and the rest is history! 

Transfer was October 1. We had 10 blasts left from the cycle with the boys. I thought for sure they would have thawed a few. You just never know. I was quite shocked when we went in and found out they only thawed ONE! ONE! That is mind boggling to me-and even more so when that one TOOK! Whoohoo! I was a bit surprised myself. 

My beta was on October 10th, a Friday. I had cramping on and off from the beginning(like the boys). One night I woke up with HORRIBLE heartburn. OMG! And I NEVER get heartburn. And I was waking up to go to the bathroom-in the middle of the night. I don't do that either. And of course-the burping. It started again! On that following Tuesday, October 7th, I took a pregnancy test. I was semi convinced I was pregnant. I didn't feel right. There were too many symptoms! I took the test while Tony was still home. I was so excited to see two lines, I ran to Tony and showed him. I was shaking. Crying. We both were. But then....

After he took his shower, he asked if I was reading the test right. I wasn't. There needed to be THREE lines, and there were TWO. However, if you looked close enough...there were THREE. It took my FIVE tests to come to the absolute conclusion there were three lines! Tony was not amused! I finally took a digital test and believed it! My beta was on Friday and it came back a nice strong 105. I was impressed! That was crazy! And I got a +hpt pretty early on. This was a nice, strong pregnancy. I couldn't believe it. I was pregnant, again. 

And to think I didn't think I would be a mother. And here I sit, in 6 short months I will be a mother to three children all under the age of two. Crazy? No.

 Lucky. Unbelievably lucky.

Books! Shuffle! Books! Stand!

The newest thing in this house is books. Nicholas has taken to reading as of late. And it's not a wide variety of books. Nope. Not at all. It's one book. MAYBE I can say two books. Mostly however, it's one. And that one is.... "Five Little Ducks." I think I will be reciting that in my sleep tonight! Today whenever he saw the book, he would bring it over to me, HAND it to me, giggle and get all excited I was going to read it. So-I would read it. He even at times tried to mimic my hand movements of the ducks going, "quack quack quack." So cute! And once I was done reading, I had to read it again. And again. He LOVES that book! It is great to see such an appreciation for books in the boys, even if it is only one or two! ;)

Now we have some big news for Anthony! Yesterday was really the first day he did a lot of this. What exactly? Standing on his OWN! Can you believe it?!?! He did it before, but it was always pretty quickly. Yesterday? It was A LOT! And it was for long periods of time. Actually, Saturday was the first day that I remember him standing for longer than 2 seconds. And, he may have actually SHUFFLED those little feet of his and moved! I can't imagine him walking! You can tell he is getting ready. He wants to move those feet...he just doesn't feel QUITE ready yet. I say..by the new year, if not sooner. Gosh. Two of them walking? YIKES!

When Anthony wakes up in the morning with me, he is very clingy! So clingy that it takes about an hour for him to leave my lap! I love it though. I can't complain! 

Also-a big hit show the boys love watching-especially Nicholas, is Jack's Big Music Show. In the morning if they are fussy, or really any time of the day when they are fussy, I say, "Wanna watch Jack?" Nicholas gives a little giggle and looks right at the TV and waits. He LOVES the music and starts to bop up and down when it comes on. Anthony is just as entranced as well. I love Noggin! It's a great channel!

We have officially stopped the morning bottle. We could probably move onto the afternoon bottle. I just don't want to. I am afraid their nap won't be as long. Lately-they have been sleeping until 7am at least, and their last nap goes from 2-3:30/4 almost ALL the time. Why mess with that!?!? I need that naptime for my own nap! LOL! We'll see. I'll set a goal of January to be done. Wait, that's a month away. Well, we'll see! ;)

Our Christmas card is done. I will post it once it's in the mail to everyone! It's a great one! I LOVE IT! And I know everyone else will too! 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Today was the boys second Thanksgiving. Although-it was the first they could actually eat at! Nicholas snacked a bit too much...so he was not keen on the turkey and all the fixings. Anthony ate much better than Nicholas. They do both love cranberry sauce however! Nicholas proceeded to eat a few bites, and then the rest found the floor. It doesn't take much. Luckily the dog ate a good amount of it. I knew there was a reason we kept her around!

The boys had a great day today. They played with their cousins Jackson and Katrina, napped well, and hung out with family. They are such easy going kids. How did I get so lucky???

So, I just wanted to take this time to say how unbelievably thankful I am that I have those boys in my life. They are my world, my everything. I thank God for those boys on a daily basis. I am glad I was chosen to have to deal with infertility. If I wasn't-those boys would not be a part of my life. And I just can not imagine my life without either one of them in it. They truly, truly, truly are just amazing kids.

Can life get any better??? I mean, really? :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Photos!

I promised some photos-so here I am with some. I just love my boys! Have I said that before? I seriously can't say it enough! Tony and I say it EVERYDAY-more than once! Even when they cry and fuss-we still say it! For instance-today I gave them some goldfish crackers for snack(they LOVE them!). Well I had Tony put them away because they would sit there and eat ALL OF THEM. Nicholas did not like that-and started to cry!!! He was so upset! Of course dh and I thought it was funny...as well as cute! 

The only new thing we are doing is trying to drop the bottles. Anthony-no problem. We've only done the morning one. Nicholas-won't have it. He whines and cries and fusses. I can't take it. It's so sad to see. Someone on another website said to wait until 15 months and then do it. I will keep trying-and have Anthony do the sippy cup-but if it doesn't work-I will give Nicholas the bottle. I am a sucker, I know! Here are some recent photos of my handsome men! 

Modeling their blazers....

Happy. Always happy. Well, almost always! ;)

They don't look thrilled here-but they do love to go grocery shopping! And they are usually the hit of the store! 

Anthony eating some Italian thing. Don't ask me the name. He liked it though.

Nicholas wating the Itailan thing as well. He didn't care for it too much. 

One Year Pedi Update!

The boys finally had their one year appt with the pedi on Thursday. All is well with both of them! They were quite the sight in the room. Nicholas was walking all over the place in his diaper, while Anthony was cruising around the room! Those two were sooo happy! Gosh-I wish I could enclose them in a room with a carpet and they be perfectly content! Who would have thought???

Anyways...Nicholas weighs in at 22.4lbs and 30 1/2 inches, and Anthony weighs in at 21.6lbs and 28 inches. He's a tad shorter... But he sure packs a punch! LOL! They were given three shots, and the flu shot was one of them. I've never had the flu shot, nor the flu-so this thing better work wonders! We have to go back next month for round 2 of the flu shot. Hopefully I remember to make an appointment. So many freaking appointments, it's ridiculous!

Speaking of appts... While the pedi was checking out Anthony's hips, I could tell he had a bit of concern. He kept manipulating Anthony's legs. I knew something was up, but what I was not sure of. So as the appt went on, I saw him looking through notes, and seem somewhat spacey. Then in the end, he told us. He said while he was checking the hips-which he typically doesn't do at this age anymore-that he noticed a clicking noise. That clicking noise could be a sign of hip dysplasia. Now-he is not overly concerned that he has it-as he does cruise and walk with a toy. He said it could just be the joints or whatever. In any event, he wants him to get an x-ray of his hips. So-that's another appt, on top of us needing to go and get their bloodwork for lead and hemoglobin levels. I can only imagine how much fun this experience is going to be. Valium anyone??

As for the boys-they are just simply amazing! When are they not? Nicholas LOVES music and to dance. It's so cute when he stands there and starts bopping up and down. He hears music and instantly stops doing whatever and starts to get his groove on! It's too cute! He also has decided that when he does not like the food he is eating, he instead will chuck it over the side of his highchair, or gladly hand it to someone near by. Apparently this is something we are going to have to work on...

Anthony is a trouble maker-but a happy one! This kid has NO fear. I caught him standing on a toy chair, getting into the entertainment center pulling out all the DVD's. STANDING on the chair! What a stinker! He likes to look at you and smile when he is doing something he knows he shouldn't. He is such a ham though! You talk to him the right way and you are guaranteed to get a smile out of him. Nicholas on the other hand, is a bit more wary of others, so he just looks ultra serious and stares! 

Tony and I went away to Vegas and we SURVIVED! The first day was really hard for me, but after that it was much better. I could not wait to land in Hartford and see my boys! We did not win any money-but we did get to stay in a deluxe suite FREE at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. Can't beat that, now can you? So if you take that into consideration-we did pretty well for ourselves. Overall the trip was relaxing, as we were not running here or there. We pretty much stayed in one place for the day and played poker. As for eating, I wasn't feeling the best while we were there, so I ate minimal amounts, which bothered me seeing how we were surrounded by wonderful restaurants! Oh well...maybe next time!

When we got home and saw the boys the following morning... They were up with Nonni(she let us sleep in a bit before she got ready for work), and I came out of the room and started calling their names. Nicholas walked around the corner and just STARED. It was like he was stunned! And then of course-he pointed at the light! Anthony smiled and started to laugh when he saw us. It was really cute. I guess they really did miss us! 

Oh-and I have to say-they have been sleeping better the last few weeks. I shouldn't say better-I should say LONGER. We'll see how long it continues, but they have also been teething so who knows. I just hope they continue to take long naps and wake up around 7am. I can like that! 

Next post I will have to add some photos of the boys! I promise!

Updating

I have been a slacker! Sorry! Every night I look at the link at the top of the page, and sometimes even click on it-and just never post. I am too tired to start writing, as once I do-it never seems to stop! So-here I am watching the most highly anticipated Presidential Election, and hopefully history in the making! 

So-what are we up to? Let's see.... Anthony had the catheter taken out on Monday. That went really well and I was so proud of him! He did not cry at all! He whimpered for a second-and it was over. He was so good! It's still swollen and sore. He needs a cream for a yeast rash, put on twice a day until that heals. He goes back in two weeks to check on the progress of the healing. He had EI on Monday and the PT was very happy with his progress. He now rolls once he gets on his back(which mommy is not thrilled with as it's making diaper changes quite difficult!). She said he has a lot more strength in his legs-which is GREAT. She can see his more steady than he was before. He also stood alone for a good 10 seconds while she was here. So-he's getting a bit more daring! And she wanted to see how he would do on the stairs-and yep-he can climb them! He only did one as he was a tad fussy-but he did it! Not sure if I should be happy about that! 

What else??? They are just little sponges! Today-Nicholas did something new....I said, "Shhhh" to him earlier. Tonight at dinner, I turned to Nicholas and said, "Shhhh" and held my finger to my mouth. He in turn-imitated me! It was SO DARN CUTE! I can't believe he picked it up so quickly! They are just amazing little boys! Nicholas walks everywhere, and he even tries to run! LOL! At least he picks up his pace. At night he seems to get a second wind-where he walks around babbling A LOT, laughing, and walking around in circles! Anthony is still smiling. He smiles, smiles, and smiles some more. He really is a trip. He is lately in the habit of wanting to be held. He looks up at you with those eyes-and when you do pick him up-he is all smiles! LOL! 

Oh-and the boys know when we are going outside, or going for a ride, or to brush their teeth! If I say any of those options-they go to the proper door, or to the bathroom. And if I say "let's go brush your teeth" the two of them HAPPILY run off to the bathroom. It is too darn cute. 

Last night-they had their FIRST bath in the big tub! It was quite the sight.... DH got them ready. I was in the bathroom getting the bath ready. Next thing I hear, "Go find mommy!" So I look out of the bathroom and I see the two of them. Stark Naked. Nicholas is walking down the hall, and Anthony is crawling. Naked. It was quite the sight! And adorable of course! So-Anthony crawls over to me and I put him in the tub. Nicholas stood at the door. And peed! TWICE! I was laughing so hard I nearly joined him! Then-he walks over to me and starts climbing up my leg trying to get into the tub! I couldn't believe it! How did he know to do that?!?! Anyways-they loved it! 

So-that's about it. Our schedule is pretty simple. They wake between 6-7am. Bottle at 7am, bkfst at 8am, nap at 9:15am. They wake up from nap and we usually play in their bedroom for a little bit. It's a change of scenery and they like it. Then we go downstairs and play some more. Or we get dressed and go somewhere, or go outside. Then it's lunch around noon. Bottle again at 1pm, nap at 1:30 or so. Wake up by 3 usually...and we go somewhere, outside, or stay home and play. Then it's dinner at 5, then more playtime, bath, bottle, and bed. We only do baths every other night-if we even remember! It's so hard! But they really are good babies. I will say though, after that second nap-they can be pretty rough! Usually they are grouchy and fussy and nothing seems to work! It is what it is!

Oh-and in 3 days....Tony and I will be in VEGAS. ALONE! I won't even get into the emotions involved in that! OK. I am off for the night. This is a long novel! 

Happy Halloween!

Surgery!

Well today was Anthony's surgery. Overall, it went well. It was a day that I did not look forward to for quite some time. I did not want my little boy to be put under, let alone be put in an immense amount of pain. I know he's on meds, but it still has to hurt! 

I didn't have time to think about the surgery, as I probably would have been a mess. I checked in on them last night, and I started to cry. I was great all morning long...And then we got in the car, I looked at him so sweet in the backseat with his little pacifier and pj's on...and just let it flow! I just wanted to hold him and protect him!! He was just too sweet!

We arrived at the hospital just after 6am(such an early morning!). We did all the paperwork, prep etc... It was decided I would go back there with him(the emotional wreck person that I am). I walked back there with him and was totally fine, until I saw the OR. The machines, EVERYTHING. It just kinda freaks you out. Then I sat down and he sat on my lap. He looked up at me with the saddest look...he was looking at my face mask. He didn't know what it was. It was so sad! Then, they came with his face mask. He fought it. And fought it. He cried. He turned his head. There eventually were three nurses and myself. I was crying. He was crying. Gosh, it was terrible. Probably moreso for me than him. Finally, he took enough deep breaths and drifted off to sleep. I gave him a kiss, and left him in their hands. 

This was before 8am. Tony and I sat and waited. And waited. And waited. We got called around 11:15/11:30am-he was out of surgery and in the recovery room. He was in there drinking his second bottle of sugar water. He was chugging! Poor guy was so hungry/thirsty!! He just laid there-relaxed, calm. My sweet Anthony...

I won't bore you with all the other stuff. Basically-we got the protocol for when we are at home-and we were on our way home after 1pm. It was a long day! He is on a lot of meds-for pain, for infection, for spasms of the bladder...It's not going to be a fun week, that's for sure. He needs to wear two diapers-one with a hole in it for the catheter and his area to go through-and the other diaper to cover that all up. Other than that-he should be good to go. Still-it's going to be a long week!

We got home at 1:30pm, had lunch and then Tony and I napped for a bit. Anthony slept on my mom and his mom's chest the rest of the afternoon. He was just so sweet. I then took over. I loved it...brought me back to when he was an infant and just lay there and sleep on your chest. Awww...Well-I was hungry. So-I had a veggie stick. I put one to his mouth-as he was laying on my chest-and SLEEPING. Well-he woke up as soon as that veggie stick hit his lips! It was like he was automatically back to his old self! He was still a bit sleepy-but he was EATING! YAY! It was so great to see that smile again! It will never get old! 

So I am happy to report that he is the happy little camper now. Well-as long as the meds are doing their job. I hope he doesn't wake tonight-but I don't have high hopes on that. If he does, we will have the medicine ready. Please let it be a good sleeping night! Here are some photos from today:

Waiting to be called:

Dressed and ready!

Looking cute! 

Playing with the toys!

It's been a tough and long day-but it's over! Anthony post-op.

Photos #2

Photos from their actual birthday... October 18th, 2008:

They are not too sure of what is in front of them...

Nicholas is all smiles! Thanks to daddy...

"Hmm...what is this?"

Just look at that face! He looks like he is in sugar shock!

This seems tasty!"

We made it one year!! It was AMAZING!
Cleaning up after cupcakes! 

Daddy planting a tree to signify the first year

The boys posing for their 12 month photo!

Look at that happy guy!

Nicholas tries out the new wheels-a gift from Mommy and Daddy!

Anthony seems to like the new wheels..

Aww...look-they are sharing!

This photo was taken at 12:57pm on October 18, exactly one year to the MINUTE, when the boys entered this world.

Anthony posing for his 12 month photos 

Photos #1

       The cakes for the adults
The cookies I slaved over a stove for two days for! But they were GOOD!
Yep-their gifts! A LOT of them! 
                     The paparazzi!
The birthday princes! Nicholas does NOT like the crown!
"Yummy! Cake!"
Nicholas wasn't so sure...
Look at that face!
Nicholas seems to enjoy it!

I'll post pics from their actual birthday tomorrow...

HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY NICHOLAS AND ANTHONY!

I can't believe it. It's unimaginable. However, I need to come to terms eventually. My baby boys..are ONE. They are no longer babies. They are toddlers. 

I do not think words will ever be able to describe the shear joy these boys have brought into my life, our lives. They are the most beautiful boys, inside and out. Their smile lights up a room, their laughter is contagious. Their looks are priceless. And they are all mine. 

After dealing with four years of infertility, and wondering if I would ever become a mother...these boys are a true miracle.  A miracle for many reasons. After three failed IVF's, our boys came to us after the fourth IVF. Someone had a bigger plan than myself. It wasn't on my time that I could have kids. Only after the boys did I realize why I hadn't been pregnant sooner-my boys weren't ready to meet me yet. And boy am I glad they picked me. They have made me the proudest mother. 

I never knew motherhood could be so rewarding. And I will be honest-and say I did not find being a mother of twins...hard. Seriously. I would do it again-happily. Sure-there were trying times, but I could possibly count them on one hand, maybe two hands. Yes, I've shed my share of tears. But in all consideration that I've been a SAHM for the last 12 months-doing this on my own, getting them on schedules, etc... it wasn't hard. You can not set yourself up for great expectations. You need to go with the flow. That's what I do. I don't read books about this or that. I read my children. I meet their needs-not the needs of the books, or the "experts." I am their mother-I know best. And I worried about this-that I wasn't this mother who was sucked into all of the info that is out there-in terms of, well, anything. As parents, we try to fit the mold of society. What everyone else thinks is right. I may not be an overly cautious mother. But I want my kids to be able to explore-and not worry about getting dirty. Or what others may think. I want them to do things on their own. They don't always need me at their side-24/7. 

When I was pregnant, I thought I would never leave the house with TWO babies. I thought I would be the biggest worry wart and not do MANY things out of fear. I thought I would worry about every fall, bump, scratch. Everything. However, I didn't. I am pretty relaxed, considering there are two of them. 

This was the most amazing year in my life. I can't believe it has gone by so fast. My two little miracles are growing up right before my eyes. I would do this over and over again. 

I've been blessed-in more ways than I could have ever imagined.

 So Nicholas and Anthony-I want to wish you the happiest birthday ever. All I ever want for you, as well as daddy, is for you to be happy. It's what counts. And to try your best. As long as you put your heart into it-you will succeed. And we will be beside you every step of the way. We love you!!!

Pictures to follow...

Busy? What's that??

Well...the party is very quickly approaching! I can't even believe it's almost here. Insanity! Especially when I thought the day would never come. I for one...am TIRED. I wouldn't happen to know why! I was up till almost 12 last night...making cookies. When I am done posting this, I am going to do another batch of sugar cookies, this time with frosting. We'll see how this recipe comes out. It's a friends grandmother's recipe. I have it in the fridge now, hoping it will harden enough for me to use the cookie cutter. It says to put in the fridge over night. I am praying it works. One less thing for me to do tomorrow!

And...I think I am getting sick. I had a cold of some sort in the beginning of the week. It seemed to disappear yesterday, and today... I don't know. It seems like it is coming back! UGH! Talk about timing!

As for the boys...well....they are quite the sight! Nicholas had EI today-to see if he still qualified. He did not of course. And it was funny...the therapists needed him to do certain tasks..well...he can be stubborn and wouldn't do it. Well, Anthony was sitting on my lap, or near me, and he would be doing what Nicholas was SUPPOSED to be doing. Such a little ham! Nicholas eventually would do the things that were asked of him-just not on cue! 

The other night we were eating steak for dinner. The boys were done with their food so we took them out of their highchairs and they were walking around. They saw Tony eating, so they were both standing at his legs, waiting or anything! Well...apparently Anthony didn't like that he couldn't have any. Next thing you know, you hear Tony go, "OWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!" OMG! I started laughing hysterically! Anthony BIT him! In the knee! It was too much! And let me tell you-he HURTS!!!

As for Nicholas and his walking....He has done it A LOT more lately. He is totally walking...But it's on his terms-and his terms only. But he walked greater distances today. I can't believe it. 11.5 months old and my little boy is walking. 

Well...I need to go make some cookies. I need to get moving so I can go to BED! At this rate...it will be tomorrow before that happens! 

Quick Updates!

I need to make this quick....as I am exhausted and not feeling up to par....

So here are some things the boys are now doing-and I noticed a lot of them this week....

1.) If you say "bye-bye" then Anthony will wave....vs me/Tony/whoever doing it also. So cute!

2.) If you say "Yay!" Nicholas will clap his hands

3.) While singing, "Five Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed" both boys will start shaking their arms/hand because you are the Dr. yelling at the monkeys. ADORABLE!

4.) Nicholas totally says Dog-as soon as Sadie walked into the room when he was up from nap today-he said, "DOG!" He's saying it more and more actually...

5.) Anthony is such a HAPPY HAPPY baby. OMG! 

6.) Nicholas loves to laugh-for NO reason whatsoever. People who don't know them-or heck, even family-will say, "He's so serious!" Ya-well he's such a sweetheart and is almost always laughing, smiling-having a good time!

7.) If you say to Anthony, "I'm going to get you" he starts crawling furiously! Nicholas has been doing this for a little bit now.

I'm sure this list could go longer. But those are some big things over the last few days. When talking to my friend who does EI-she said them doing "Bye-bye" without me showing them-is a good thing-so we've accomplished that!

They are such love bugs! I love how they crawl over to me and lay their head on my legs, chest, shoulder-whatever. When Nicholas gets excited and he's happy to see me/be with me...he starts jumping up in my arms and flailing his arms. It's so darling to see!!

Today while on the way home from the park-where we took a walk and had snack-which they proceeded to get all over me(applesauce) as they were so excited to have applesauce(LOVE it!), they were having a good chuckle in the backseat. I could see the two of them trying to lean forward..and they would see each other and laugh. Giggle. So sweet. And they would both hit their heads-and laugh some more. 

I seriously want to stop time. I am beyond enjoying this time. Who knew motherhood was so rewarding???? 

AHHH!! WALKING!

Even though it is WAY past my bedtime...I am posting this. Today-Nicholas WALKED. And I mean WALKED. HE moved from here, to there, to here. AMAZING! When EI was here this afternoon with Anthony, we noticed Nicholas was letting go a bit more and walking. He would take 2 steps, 3 steps, 4 steps...And he went up to about 15 before he stopped. It was the greatest sight to see! Then in the kitchen, he walked from the stove...out to the kitchen floor a bit...back to the fridge. And he was so cute....walking with a bit of uncertainty. Love it!

And then-while Anthony's therapist(for rolling over) was writing up her work for the day, I had Anthony on his back to practice rolling/sitting up. Well...he fussed a little bit, and I made him chuckle. Nicholas came over and the two of them were laughing! It was SO darling! Nicholas would try to kiss Anthony, hug him, he was trying to do handstands...they were LOVING it! I just wish I had that darn video camera on me. It was the most precious sight to see. And now-they just sit there-and sometimes if they look at each other at the right moment-they start giggling. And Nicholas does this thing now where he kinda laughs-and forces it, and closes his eyes a bit. Priceless I tell ya. Priceless.

It is so amazing to watch the two of them grow....and interact...How cool would it be to have another set? Can you imagine being born with your best friend?? What an amazing gift!

WORDS!

It's official-Nicholas has a word! This morning we were in the kitchen and I had the gate up. He was playing by the gate. Sadie was still upstairs, and then made her way down. She walked over to the gate, Nicholas heard her, pointed, and said, "DOG!" Ok-so maybe it wasn't exactly perfectly clear-but trust me-it WAS dog! Later on, I was reading "Brown Bear, Brown Bear What Do You See?" And when I got the the "white dog, white dog" part, he turned and pointed at Sadie and said "dog!" What a smart baby I have- the two of them! I worry about the words/speech because boys in general are a bit slower in that category than girls. Well-my boys will show them!

Anthony says mamama and dada. Dada is more prevalent than mama, but that's ok. They love their dada! He says mama more when he's angry-and I guess when he wants me-so that's a good thing! It's funny because the two of them are having conversations with themselves. It's so fun to watch them just babble on throughout the day. It's like they are really talking!

I have to say-they love each other so much! At least Anthony ADORES Nicholas! I will say Nicholas adores Anthony too, but Anthony just smiles from ear to ear when Nicholas comes near! Nicholas tries to kiss Anthony(at least I hope so) when he is near him. It's so fun to watch. Can you imagine me having one baby do this?? Boring! LOL! It's so much better with two! Call me crazy if you want! Anthony has gotten much better at walking with the push toy. And he's getting more, what's the word....carefree??? maybe with cruising. Where he will let go of me and quickly grab something else. I think he's a quick learner-I really do, except when it comes to rolling! That's another story!

Nicholas can practically run around the coffee table! He's taken a bunch of steps-but will not walk! I think he is like his cousin Jackson where he needs to be absolutely sure-and have mastered it to an extent-before he takes off. Trust me, I'm not rushing it-but I also can't wait to see it! 

We went to the Big E today for the last time. It wasn't a great trip as the weather was pretty gross, and then it started to rain. Nicholas was not having a great time-I don't think he could see us well-and started wailing! Poor kid! Towards the end Anthony had had it too. We survived though-they were fine. I did see a younger type mom with a wagon-filled with kids-2 of which were twins. I did a double take and made sure they were twins-boys too-and kept walking. I heard the mother say, probably so I could hear her, "Ya, wait until they are older!" Hey-sorry lady if your kids are hellions or whatever-but I will do everything in my power to raise my children with honesty, respect, love, etc...  I hate people who think they know everything-an b**** about every little thing their kids do. So sad! ENJOY THEM!!!! 

Well-we are FIVE days away from a party. FIVE. I can't even begin to think of all the stuff that needs to be done. A LOT! I am excited for the boys though. They won't remember this party-but I will-and it's amazing to see how many people's lives they have touched over the last year. Simply amazing. Mommy and Daddy's life will never be the same-and we are more than grateful for that! 

Walk, walk, walk some more!

10 steps. TEN. He took ten steps alone today! I can't believe he's starting to walk! And to think that he was so small and helpless once! I am just wondering when he will just GO. Although I will be honest, I don't know if I am ready for that to happen. He's still my baby. I don't ever want him-or his brother-to grow up!

Not too much else to report on. They now know the word Elmo. I think that's 10 words or so that they know. Light, dog, Sadie, ball, TV, phone, dada, mama, book, bear, elmo, and grandpa. I have some smart kids! And I am not sure if I mentioned it before-but I swear Nicholas says dog. About a week or so ago-he was eating breakfast-and I swear he said dog-and he has said it a few times since-to Sadie nonetheless! 

I am getting a cold and I am exhausted. It's been a long long week! It rained today so we were stuck inside and Nicholas wanted to go outside and cried when I shut the door. Poor kid. I need to take them outside more-even in their jackets and sweatsuits!

I got ALL of their laundry done. ALL of it. My mother and mother-in-law thankfully folded it all. I owe them my life. Now I just have to put it all away. Fingers crossed I get that done. 

We are not in full steam ahead mode to get ready for this party. I need to get my rest-we have a busy weekend ahead! Oh-and one small note-Nicholas got his first black eye-from his mommy. I felt beyond horrible for my poorl little boy. I was giving Anthony his bottle, grabbed it quickly off the table, and it slipped and hit him right below his eye. He wailed. I cried. Guilt is the worst. Of course he was fine afterwards-but initially, I felt like the worst mommy in the world. I guess it's all about parenthood... Some things people never warn you about! 

Double this, Double that...

Double everything-and I am LOVING IT! You know... I was in the boys bedroom this afternoon(when they decided to totally SKIP their nap) and Nicholas was standing above me. I was laying there and thinking, "How could I EVER EVER complain about my boys? HOW?" Honestly-there are people-and they have every right I am sure-to complain about their children. I don't mean that they regret them-just that it's hard. I get it. I really do. I don't want to sound mean. But-as I was laying there-looking at MY son-my TWO sons, when at one point, I never thought I would be given the chance to HAVE children, I was grateful. Grateful that I can't complain. That I won't complain. Never. I was given the best gift ever-to be a mother. Why would I complain? Sure-long nights are hard. Constant crying-it can get on your last nerve. But you know what-I will never complain about it. 

Afterall-I was given the chance to be a mom. Hopefully a good mom. And one-who you will never hear complain. I have my miracle boys. And I am glad they waited until the right time-to have me as their mother. 

A BIG THANK YOU!

I want to take this time to thank Lyndsie, who I met on a forum on BabyCenter for redesigning my blog! I am not up to speed on changing backgrounds, etc(which is probably a good thing as I would do it all the time!). She graciously offered to do it for me on her spare time(with 4 month old twins and a 3 year old!). 

I think it looks GREAT and not so boring like it was before! So Lyndsie-THANK YOU AGAIN!!!! It's beautiful!!!! :)

1....2....3....

STEPS! Yes! Nicholas took THREE steps all by himself! Yay Nicholas! He actually took 3 steps yesterday-but he did it AGAIN today! It was funny because we were outside on the deck-just me and the boys-and I see Nicholas stand up without holding onto anything. I thought to myself, "Wow! I think that's a big step for him!" Well-he stood up, bent down, stood up, bent down. It was adorable! And he did all of this without holding onto anything. Once he was done bouncing-he took three steps-all on his own! He is beyond close to walking-it's crazy. 

We had dinner at my parents tonight. The boys were hilarious, as they usually are. Anthony was growling during dinner-it's a new thing-and quite funny. It was mostly when he had his banana-which they are both obsessed about! Then...he was eating some peaches, and mumbling the whole time-again-hilarious. And when he was done with that-he was grinding his teeth! Nicholas was laughing when you turned your head to look at him. While at my parents he is obsessed with the fans and the lights-he is always looking at the ceiling. Kinda funny. We asked where grandma was and he didn't quite respond. We asked where grandpa was, he turned around, smiled, and pointed at grandpa! Grandma was NOT impressed! 

Tomorrow we will hopefully do some type of outing. If it's nice maybe I will take them for a walk at the park. Get them out of the house before we are staying in due to the winter! 

11 Months...It's going by too fast...

Eek. Less than a month. My baby boys are going to be toddlers. In less than a month. Has anyone figured out how to stop time? Seriously this is just crazy. The boys are SO much fun now. They are filled with laughter and little giggles. They smile constantly. They are just such a joy to be around! Sure-they have their moments. Like Nicholas waking up at 11 pm and crying for a good 30 minutes. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He finally went back to sleep after a bottle-and was up again around 1am... It was a long night. Sure they have temper tantrums of some sort. Yes they cry and try to climb up my leg and want me to hold them. Yes they hate getting their face washed, or their diaper changed. But-will I complain? Never. Do I hate it? Not quite. Would I change it for the world? Never in a million years. I waited my whole life to be a mom and I am still in awe that I am a mom. I was taking Nicholas out of his car seat the other day and it hit me. I was a mom. I had, not one son, but TWO sons. At the same time. And both are what I call my little miracles. Being worth the wait is an understatement!

We are in countdown mode for their party! 13 more days to go! I hope it all goes well as we have never hosted a party to this extent. I want it to be perfect. I want nothing to go wrong. I can only assume SOMETHING will go wrong. Right now-I am praying for a beautiful, sunny day. I don't care if it's 50 degrees out. It beats rain! Now there are about 55 or so people who have responded yes. We have at least another 50 who have yet to respond.... The deadline is this Friday. This might get interesting! 

October is going to be quite the busy month for us! Between birthday parties, their actual birthday, Anthony's surgery, Halloween...we are going to be tired at the end of the month! 

I will keep this short, as there isn't too much to report on. Both boys are doing great. Anthony is cruising more and more-and he even has started to push the push toy and walk with it! He looks so proud doing it! Hopefully I will end with a few pictures.... Enjoy! 

CHEESE!

Look at that face!

Anthony poses for his 11 month photos!

Nicholas poses for his 11 month old photos!

The boys together for their 11 month photos!

**Awwwww**

Have I mentioned how much I LOVE my boys??? LOL! They are just the best boys EVER! Over the weekend we went to the Big E with them for the first time. Tony and I were SO excited! The boys could have cared less-but they were really good and we were there for 4 hours. They got quite upset when we were a bit late in getting their dinner. Other than that-they were great! We even took them out of the stroller twice and they sat on the grass and loved it! On our way out I gave them a taste of some ice cream-Anthony LAUGHED when he saw the ice cream. He LOVED it! Nicholas did too!

On Sunday we went to Red Robin for dinner-alone WITH the boys-and again-they were GREAT! They were just so darn cute! There was so much to look at-they had a blast. Nicholas loved looking at the ceiling and the lights-as well as the balloons. Anthony was the people watcher(like his mommy) and that entertained him as well! They had grilled cheese and mac-n-cheese. They ate like champs! On the way out the door we grabbed two balloons-one blue the other green. Anthony's popped in the car(he didn't even react). Nicholas' survived the trip. I asked Tony what he wanted to do with the balloon-either keep it for the boys or release it to our nephews. And that's exactly what we did. I went and put a message on the balloon and then we went outside on the deck and released it as a family. I didn't think it would hit me as hard as it did-but it did. Especially when I couldn't see it anymore...

Today was EI-mostly for Anthony. We are still working on his rolling from back to belly. And today I can say he did REALLY good. He ALMOST rolled over for the first time-on his own. It was so good to see him working so hard. By the end he was pretty done though. He did a great job though! While he was working on his rolling, Nicholas was crawling over to me-all happy-and crawling up me, giving me kisses, and then laying his head on my chest. He would leave, go play for a bit, and then come back over and give the kisses, etc. It was SO CUTE! He did this numerous times-he was soo happy! LOVED it! 

After EI we went to a pasta dinner to support The Ronald McDonald House. The boys of course were a hit. Covered in pasta sauce-which they LOVE-and happy as clams. It came time to leave and I didn't have my keys. I called Tony and asked him if he had my keys(he went with his dad, his mom came with me). He insisted he did not. I checked the diaper bag repeatedly-nothing. I went back into the restaurant-nothing. Finally I was thinking to myself. My mother. I call her and call her and call her. Not home. Not answering her phone. This all started around 6:30pm/6:45pm. The boys go to bed around 7pm every night. Well-at 7pm, I FINALLY got a hold of my mother.

Me: "Mom, do you have my keys?" 

Mom: "No. Why would I have your keys?"

Me: "Can you check?"

Mom: "Now why the hell do I have your keys? How the hell did that happen?"

Yep. She had them. It was 7pm and she had just walked in the door and had to turn around and bring me my keys. So the boys and I, along with my mil and dh, were stuck in the restaurant waiting. Like I said before-my boys are amazingly well behaved-and did great. So all in all it was not a big deal. If they were terrors-well I would have a few things to say! At 7:45pm mom pulled up and we left. The boys were in bed just after 8pm, sound asleep. Not a peep out of 'em!

That was our exciting aventure over the weekend! The boys are now giving kisses-gotta love the wide open mouth attacks! They love their momma! They know the word "bear" now too. That brings the total words known to 6/7! Smart kids I tell ya! Nicholas took some small steps again today-but with one foot(his left). Little stinker can totally walk-if he just did it! And Anthony is officially cruising-that happened more so over the weekend. Oh-and Nicholas can officially climb all 12 stairs. Yep-he did it-I was behind him of course and was he oh so proud! Anthony hasn't tried yet. I think his legs are a little short! Did I mention he was wearing 3/6mth pants?!!?!? 

Dog. Dog. Woof. Woof.

I think it's official. Nicholas has his first word. I don't know what exactly qualifies for a first word. Is it dada? Well-if it is-then this is his 2nd word! This morning Nicholas was in his high chair eating breakfast. I said, "dog." And you know what? He said it too! Now-it wasn't clear-as-day DOG-but it was there-and it was audible. I was able to get some of it on my cell video. My friend who works in Early Intervention heard it and said yes. He can say DOG! Now of course-he didn't say it the rest of the day(well maybe once or twice...)! And whenever I say the word dog-both boys go looking for Sadie!

I just think my boys are the smartest babies ever! DH and I were out this evening-and the two of us were gushing about how much we LOVE our boys-how great they are-how they make us smile, laugh, EVERYTHING. And most importantly-how GRATEFUL we are for the boys we have-and their health. We count our blessings everyday. They truly are a miracle. And I am so glad to call them mine!

I can't wait to see them in the morning. They always make me smile! :)

Humor Me

I am not so sure how many people-if ANY-read this blog(minus my sister who harrasses me about updating-yet has missed three posts, and Jeff. They don't count.).

BUT-it needs help! And if there is anyone out there that is "blog-savvy" and would LOVE to help me-I would greatly appreciate it! For instance-a background. I want a nice cute one, with pictures of the boys on it-like a scrapbook page thing. And-on th sidebar-I would like to add a list of the blogs I read. I don't know how to do that!

And for all you twin mommies(not sure how many...but at least 3), if you could give me the link to your blogs so I can add it to my list-that has yet to be formed on my sidebar! LOL! But I can still add it as a bookmark! Thanks! 

love,

The Savvy-less Blogger Me! 

One SMALL step....

Yep. You read that right! One small STEP. Alone. Nothing to hold onto. Standing on two feet. He did it. Barely. But he did it. And I couldn't be prouder! This evening, Nicholas was playing with his push toy(which I have come to the conclusion that I should have bought two of...but that's a different story!). The toy was a bit in front of him, just out of his reach. He was standing right by me, the toy in front of him, holding onto NOTHING. And he moved. Forward. On two feet. Those two tiny little feet that spent MONTHS kicking me(and yes I enjoyed every minute of it). Those two tiny feet that moved involuntarily for the first few months. Those tiny feet that couldn't keep socks on. Those tiny feet that are just the most precious. They moved. He moved them. All by himself. 

Now-if you blinked-you missed it. It was more like a shuffle. He still isn't so sure of himself. I swear-ANY DAY now-he's going to be gone. Gone from wanting to be smothered with kisses because he can move on his own free will. Gone to go explore a world unbeknownst to him until now. Gone from needing me at every waking moment. Gone from being a baby. On his way to being an independent toddler. I'm not ready. He's still a baby. My baby. And forever he shall be....

DADA! WALKING(kinda...)

Alright alright. It's time for me to start taking out the kleenex. My boys are getting too big. They need to stop growing. Now. Seriously. I am not kidding in the least bit. Here's an update...

While in Italy, Nonni worked on "Where's the light?"-in Italian of course-with the boys. So-now they know "light" in English and Italian. I have been working on "ball" and "Sadie/doggie" with them. They know those. Well tonight, I finished giving Anthony his bottle and sat him on my lap. I said to him, "Where's dada?" He turned to dh, and smiled! HE KNOWS!!! Talk about melting your heart! I did it a few times to make sure it wasn't a fluke-and he would smile-and he even pointed once or twice! How freaking adorable is that?? I LOVE IT!

Nicholas...Nicholas..Last Thursday, September 4, he took his little push toy, stood up, and tried to walk! I was right there-and I had to hold the toy close to him so he didn't fall flat on his face! So that was the first day he tried ON HIS OWN-and he succeeded! Then on Friday, dh said he went up and down the hallway! Can you believe that?? He's sooo ready to start walking! Any day now any day! 

Tony(dh) and I were eating dinner and I was saying how it was funny because I missed the boys(they were in bed for the night). He said he felt the same way. On the weekends, he says it's great he gets to see more of them and all, but the crying gets old quick. He said though when he gets to work, he just sees their picture and wants to be with them all the time. How sweet is that? And it's so true. If we are away from them-we just want to BE with them. You never know what you are going to miss! They just grow so quickly!

Today the boys were playing at the train table in their play room. This is where they pull themselves up to stand, take apart the train track that I have put together 1,346 times, and slam it to the ground! Well Nicholas took a train and sat down at the end of the table, where there was the handle-so you could pick up the table. He would sit down and put the train on the train table, through this handle. Then he would stand up and get it off the table, and do it again. And while doing this, he was talking to himself. Can you believe that? Oh-and we also have a toy that you put the balls in on top and they spin to the bottom. Well Nicholas takes a train, again, and puts it in the space where the ball would go. It falls down. Then he takes his hand, and puts his HAND through the space where the ball goes, and reaches and grabs the train-and pulls it back up-THROUGH the HOLE! I think he's going to be a GREAT thinker! He already is! I don't know. I just find that amazing. It's like his little mind is already doing cause and effect, or something of the like! 

Well-here are a few photos I promised. If I posted all of them-well-I owuld never be able to write! There are just soo many photos of the boys! How can you not love them all????

                                          Their 9 month photo shoot-in Italy

                                             I just LOVE this photo of him!

Gotta love 'em! Tony and I found these shirts at a store in Italy. "Future Italian Captain"

How perfect is that?????

                         I LOVE this photo of Nicholas! The two of them could be models!