HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY NICHOLAS AND ANTHONY!

I can't believe it. It's unimaginable. However, I need to come to terms eventually. My baby boys..are ONE. They are no longer babies. They are toddlers. 

I do not think words will ever be able to describe the shear joy these boys have brought into my life, our lives. They are the most beautiful boys, inside and out. Their smile lights up a room, their laughter is contagious. Their looks are priceless. And they are all mine. 

After dealing with four years of infertility, and wondering if I would ever become a mother...these boys are a true miracle.  A miracle for many reasons. After three failed IVF's, our boys came to us after the fourth IVF. Someone had a bigger plan than myself. It wasn't on my time that I could have kids. Only after the boys did I realize why I hadn't been pregnant sooner-my boys weren't ready to meet me yet. And boy am I glad they picked me. They have made me the proudest mother. 

I never knew motherhood could be so rewarding. And I will be honest-and say I did not find being a mother of twins...hard. Seriously. I would do it again-happily. Sure-there were trying times, but I could possibly count them on one hand, maybe two hands. Yes, I've shed my share of tears. But in all consideration that I've been a SAHM for the last 12 months-doing this on my own, getting them on schedules, etc... it wasn't hard. You can not set yourself up for great expectations. You need to go with the flow. That's what I do. I don't read books about this or that. I read my children. I meet their needs-not the needs of the books, or the "experts." I am their mother-I know best. And I worried about this-that I wasn't this mother who was sucked into all of the info that is out there-in terms of, well, anything. As parents, we try to fit the mold of society. What everyone else thinks is right. I may not be an overly cautious mother. But I want my kids to be able to explore-and not worry about getting dirty. Or what others may think. I want them to do things on their own. They don't always need me at their side-24/7. 

When I was pregnant, I thought I would never leave the house with TWO babies. I thought I would be the biggest worry wart and not do MANY things out of fear. I thought I would worry about every fall, bump, scratch. Everything. However, I didn't. I am pretty relaxed, considering there are two of them. 

This was the most amazing year in my life. I can't believe it has gone by so fast. My two little miracles are growing up right before my eyes. I would do this over and over again. 

I've been blessed-in more ways than I could have ever imagined.

 So Nicholas and Anthony-I want to wish you the happiest birthday ever. All I ever want for you, as well as daddy, is for you to be happy. It's what counts. And to try your best. As long as you put your heart into it-you will succeed. And we will be beside you every step of the way. We love you!!!

Pictures to follow...